[kj] an old cripple writes..............

[Rob's Arse]

i think not now mate. such a shame!

still, I shall get over sometime and you can give me a k j related nyc tour!

--- "Alex Smith" <vassifer@earthlink.net> wrote:

Welcome back, Rob you big klutz! So, do you think you're going to make it to
NYC for the Oct 22 gig? 

Alex in NYC


----------
>From: Rob's Arse <joker@Z6.com>
>To: gathering@misera.net
>Subject: [kj] an old cripple writes..............
>Date: Thu, Sep 25, 2003, 10:40 AM
>

>
>
>Hello Gathering!
>
>I am back from an unplanned exile. Boy am I relieved!
>
>Today is my 35th birthday and I am typing this from my laptop sat on the 
>couch with my left leg well and truly rested!
>
>Last Monday, I was ushering my four year old son out of the door to 
>nursery. My wife and I were planning to go looking for flooring for some 
>building work we are having done  when it all went.............wrong!
>
>I was being beaten by a four year old with a blow up toy (no, not one of 
>mine) when, in the excitement I managed to bang my head on a low door 
>frame. I lost my balance and went over on my ankle. Both ankles have been 
>weak since childhood.  There was a loud crack a sharp pain and I fell over.
>
>I moved my leg but my left foot just flopped. It sat there like a wet rag 
>as I was consumed by pain like you never knew existed. An ambulance was 
>called and within 10 minutes I was on my way to Oxford's John Radcliffe 
>hospital where they confirm two breaks and a dislocation! Deep joy! The 
>drugs they gave me though we superb! I lost the pain and developed a deep 
>deep voice brought on by the gas and air. I was pissed out of my head on 
>gas and air and morphine and began doing Barry White impressions, laughing 
>hysterically, halucentating and then telling everyone I met that I 
>recognised them. All this time my wife was shushing me and aplogising. It 
>only got serious when they pulled my leg back into place. Watching your leg 
>perform such stunts is rather sobering and no amount of drugs can hide the pain!.
>I then had to wait 7 days for the swelling to go down so that they could 
>operate. I know have a 5 inch metal plate in one of the bones and ten nice 
>shiney screws! I shall be bleeping airport security machines for evermore!
>
>I chose a nice bright pink cast just to piss my kids off and am now 
>hobbling everywhere on crutches and getting as much sympathy as possible.
>
>I have to say that the health care I received and all my fellow inmates too 
>was absolutely first class. This is my first real experience of the NHS and 
>I am very impressed. These folks get a great deal of criticism, but they 
>got a new fan here!
>
>It's good to be back but moshing is of the list for the tour!
>
>So what's the score? I genuinely missed you freaks! What have I missed?
>
>Lots of  love
>
>Bob the cripple
>
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