[kj] A TRUE Awakening PLEASE FORWARD TO KJ from Liz from Amsterdam

[liszy le clercq]

Totally agree...with the first 2 sentences of alinea (or how you guys call it) no.1I'm sure you so deserve your beautiful Miracle so don't agree with your last words there, yet so good you remind yourself not to become one!.
 
And I totally agree with all of alinea no. 2 and next time I meet Geordie and he starts moaning about what wasn't perfect, I'll so tell him about your diamond theory! Oh, well..hereby if he get's to read it!
 
 
I meant to mostly write down my experience for my friends and myself of course!
Hoping Woody would be interested and any other gatherers and that someone would get this e-mail to KJ or management made me share it with you. I think this e-mail could also be considered to be the longest fan- (still don't like that word) letter ever written and maybe I should also send it to Guinness Book of Records,ha,ha.
  
I have actually had a magical long weekend in London but since I got back in Amsterdam, an even more magical euforic state took over that made me address everything in my life and everything seems relevant. Revelations. I speak like an oracle. Like I'm telling people my thoughts and I don't even know them myself yet, but they just come out and then make total sense and the big picture get's bigger and clearer and every little thing even more relevant!) It's like I woke up from a coma and now know all the answers how to change my life and actually live it rather than feel lived! There have been many factors or should I say whatever the catalyst was, every event/meeting/conversation/coincidental sign/and for the first time of my life: every KJ songtext, seems relevant in and for my experience. 
First of all: I want to really say thank you for the people in my life especially this weekend. 
Gratitude towards Arabella, Brian and Caelum, Woody and other gatherers. To all the people I had lovely and obviously inspiring conversations with..You all know who you are! 
 
To Eddy from Nottinghill: where's that e-mail!? and to dr. Gordon: hope you're feeling better, get in touch! Someone who knows them: Need to speak to these guys!
 
And a total big thanks for MY MAN Bas and our lovely, wise and superfunny daughter Tori; my father Ton that he always likes to spend time (and do a concert) with me; my stepmother/mominlaw Marga for, well obviously she plays a double part in my life and she is very important; her daughter, Simone making her my stepsisterinlaw: she and her family are so inspiring and have such a nice circle of family and friends, they are the sweetest! My inspiring mother Tonny (since 3 years half paralized in a wheelchair and still fighting to walk, refusing to give up ..and she's doing it!) and my inspiring stepdad Peter (I just realized without him I would have never met KJ at the age of 13/14!) who takes such good care for her, (well together with me but I get paid for it by the state!) and always still making business and travelplans..and they are doing it!) phewwwwww.......I think I've got them all (and if not sorry).........for not making it to difficult for me to do this 3 concertstour or should I now say 'trip'. 
 
Special thank you for Arabella for always giving me more than just a roof over my head (even my own room!) in her wonderful "circle".
True gratitude to all of them for being in my life. And gratitude to all of my old and dear friends. Most of my friends have been in my life for about 20 or 25 years. Although you loose touch sometimes they are always just a phonecall away even years later! And if they or people/things in general let you down like 2 times out of 3, 5 out of 10 or whatever works for you, and you feel you totally addressed the problem and done your thing to change: it might be time to open your eyes and realize it could be time to move on and these people/things/jobs are keeping you from it. I mean it could be? Couldn't it? So many people are just so busy trying to make a living they forget about life, yes they do! Move towards what you want to achieve!.
 
What happened to me and what it's about? They are just my thoughts I feel compulsed to share.
I'ts about making your own path/plans to make yourself happier and be creative in any form that makes you happy. You have to be selfish sometimes for the greater good. Follow you heart (that's you leader!) and make the most of it. Strive for more! Doesn't mean you live your live like you're alone on this world and letterly live your life like kings and queens and turn a blind eye, but if you live your life respectable, you will automatically remember that and be rememberd for that! Act now! There might not be a tomorrow.And more similair thoughts.
 
Almost scary this awakening, but friends and family have seen it happen to me and so far thanked me for all I said (even when they could hardly get a word in between and totally had to listen to what I had to say?!) and they all went straight away into action! A bit scared I might come of as a lunatic but since my circle has shown me trust it's all good! You, Woody met me several times so it's good you kind of know who I am. I was also invited to a Levetation session somewhere next year, and oh yes sure I would like a chance to witness that!, but seriously I would like to make a joke to that person and say: ahum well, yes normally I kind of hang around with more down to earth people!!Ha, Ha! (so get that invitation to me and my father, ha,ha!)
 
I have a bit of a feeling like: this cannot be good for me cause I have had a week of fist little sleep because of travelling and concerts and now another week because my stream of thoughts is keeping me awake! O I have slept 6 hours today so maybe it's wearing off. I'm hoping to sort of never be the same again and yet kind of be more myself! I'm soooooooo tired though, and would actually like to finish of with my usual Lizzzzzzzzzzzzzz but I have to let it out! 
 
I already wanted to share with you all that it is so nice that someone always let's the gathering know about the played setlist because when I'm standing there I totally go with the flow (and NO I'm defenitely not a dead fish!) and let the music take over! Afterwards I have no clue of the setlist played (it does mostly come back to memory later) and most of the time I have no clue of what Jaz is saying or singing about (good thing I have the live cd's!). Lyrics never seemed to be so clear to me. Killing Joke, for me was always about a very strong "guts" feeling not even listening that much to the lyrics. English is not my language. I have to use a dictionary for the fancier words but I'm afraid I have the same thing with my Dutch, ha,ha (oh, no, please ignore some of the ha, ha's fearing I might seem manic!).
 
I'm Dutch (half Dutch half Indonesian) and not very educated. I left highschool without my diploma/certificate, but did go "back to school" and I now realize that I have been blessed with great jobs that made me who I am today and gave me my skills. Even all of the horrible jobmoments have been good for something. O how horrible that I have become one of those positive people! (Has anyone seen the recent House episodes? Argh, O SOOoo relevant they all seemed to me while watching during insomnia and they still do!) Hey I think I got enough written down now so I can finally get some sleep! Lizzzzzzzzzzzzz
 
Would like response but need time to rest. Anyone who wishes to contact me: please write To Liz in the subjectheader so I can fish you out of the hundreds of misera gathering e-mails I'm daily receiving/deleting. To some of you: I feel you might be spending to much time on the board. Maybe sharing this story is also for you. Get a life!! 
 
 



Date: Mon, 6 Oct 2008 08:31:26 +0100From: woody2shooz at gmail.comTo: gathering at misera.netSubject: [kj] An Awakening
Well, what a weekend. A good Gathering with our favourite hosts never fails to remind me of my humanity, and what a miserable bastard I can be! 
 
For me, Saturday was the more complete Killing Joke funky dance fest. Geordies struggle during Communion added an extra element to the night, after all,doesn't a diamond sparkle because of its flaws? The beauty of a live performance.
 
Until next time...
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