[kj] Oh tea: helpdesk thingies

[bluce ree]

I can beat all of these.  I used to work in an IT training place in Wimbledon.  Somebody asked how to print out a page.  Fair enough.  Printed it, then he asked...
 
"but the video isnt moving"
 
on the print out....
 
oh jesus.....
 


fatpotanga <fatpotanga at SexMagnet.com> wrote:

HELPDESK LOG...

Helpdesk: What kind of computer do you have?

Female customer: A white one...

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Hi, this is Celine. I can't get my diskette out.

Helpdesk: Have you tried pushing the button?

Customer: Yes, sure, it's really stuck.

Helpdesk: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note ."

Customer: No ... wait a minute... I hadn't inserted it yet... it's still
on my desk... sorry

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Helpdesk: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen.

Customer: Your left or my left?

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Helpdesk: Good day. How may I help you?

Male customer: Hello.. I can't print.

Helpdesk: Would you click on start for me and ..

Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me! I'm not Bill
Gates damn it!

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Hi good afternoon, this is Martha, I can't print. Every time I try it
says 'Can't find printer'. I've even lifted the printer and placed it in
front of the monitor, but the computer still says he can't find it...

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: I have problems printing in red...

Helpdesk: Do you have a color printer?

Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Helpdesk: What's on your monitor now ma'am?

Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me in the supermarket.


--------------------------------------------------------------------

Helpdesk: And now hit F8.

Customer: It's not working.

Helpdesk: What did you do, exactly?

Customer: I hit the F-key 8-times as you told me, but nothing's
happening...

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.

Helpdesk: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?

Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.

Helpdesk: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.

Customer: OK

Helpdesk: Did the keyboard come with you?

Customer: Yes

Helpdesk: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another
keyboard?

Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work!

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Helpdesk: Your password is the small letter a as in apple, a capital
letter V as in Victor, the number 7.

Customer: Is that 7 in capital letters?

--------------------------------------------------------------------

A customer couldn't get on the internet.

Helpdesk: Are you sure you used the right password?

Customer: Yes I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.

Helpdesk: Can you tell me what the password was?

Customer: Five stars.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Helpdesk: What antivirus program do you use?

Customer: Netscape.

Helpdesk: That's not an antivirus program.

Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screensaver on
my computer, but every time I move the mouse, it disappears!

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Helpdesk: Microsoft Tech. Support, may I help you?

Old woman: Good afternoon! I have waited over 4 hours for you.

Can you please tell me how long it will take before you can help me?

Helpdesk: Uhh..? Pardon, I don't understand your problem?

Old woman: I was working in Word and clicked the help button more than
4 hours ago.
Can you tell me when you will finally be helping me?

--------------------------------------------------------------------

Helpdesk: How may I help you?

Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.

Helpdesk: OK, and, what seems to be the problem?

Customer: Well, I have the letter a, but how do I get the circle around
It?



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